Doesn’t it often happen that you are busy with your everyday life and suddenly something happens that triggers your deepest memories? It can be a song playing nearby, a phrase that holds a different meaning for you or a place that signifies a special event; these flashbacks may well set the tone of the entire day or even your week.
Everyone has such memories that willingly or unwillingly occupy their minds. For some it may be a lost lover, for some, it may be words left unsaid, and for some, it might be a traumatic experience all of these experiences are safely stored in a very discrete part of the brain. The most common type of recalls which haunt us are of the dreams or ideas which could not be achieved. Some people have a hard time accepting and living with their own failures; life has a way of bringing that person back to the same failure until the person acknowledges it and learns to move past it.
However, not all memories are negative or traumatic in nature. Some events which have a huge impact on you in a
positive way also become a part of your memories. It may be the day you got married, a certain trip, the birth of your first child, etc. These remembrances work as an antidote in our sad times and we like revisiting them often, to relive in them once again.
Now moving to the real question of how to get rid of memories or should we actually try to get rid of these memories? The answer as astonishing as it sounds, should definitely be; no. Our remembrances are necessarily not good or bad in nature, rather it’s our perception that make it a good or a bad experience. Memories are one of the most amazing gifts to mankind as it is through these experiences that we learn. Each memory that becomes a part of you carries with it a lesson; it has a take away which most people fail to see.
In the Quran Allah has clearly mentioned: ‘Verily with hardship comes ease. ’ (Ash-Sharh Verse 5) Losing a loved one is definitely a very painful experience but if we get rid of this memory then how will we know the value of the loved ones that are still around us? This became a part of your reminiscence to remind you of the pain that you went through when you lost someone close to you and ultimately makes you value those who are still present. Similarly, a happy moment exists to help you get through hard times, remembering that the tough times will end as well!
Allah has created everything around us for a reason. The true success of man comes when he begins to ponder over Allah’s decisions and learns to grab the lesson hidden in them. Life in itself is completely balanced and so are our memories. We should learn to live with our recalls, good or bad, as they teach us a lot about ourselves and the world around us. Embrace your experiences; don’t allow that song, phrase, or name to put a pause/stop at your life. It is okay to be vulnerable, don’t let your emotions control your life, rather maneuver and manage which emotion you want to feel and how long will you allow them to stay!